Today is a very proud day for me and you might wonder how being forced into world of prematurity can make me proud but I will explain why…
Life is difficult for most people even those without a preemie or sick child, just battling everyday life, things that may seem trivial to us but enormous things to them. Most people don’t turn the worst experience of their lives into a positive and yet the world of prematurity just over spills positivity, love, admiration and support.
Prematurity isn’t a word, it is a box of fireworks feelings; anger, joy, elation, you just never know if it will end up a beautiful display or destroying the world as you know it.
We can’t ask for a second chance at it, we have to deal with what life has given us and carry on regardless of how scared we are of the outcome because we always live for that tiny peace of hope, we live for those tiny people regardless how small.
I have been on the prematurity rollercoaster for 13 years, as have so many thousands of parents in the UK as prematurity doesn’t stop for everyone once we get to take our babies home sometimes it happens again and again with no reason why, each time taking a bigger peace of you emotionally.
I realised by forming a preemie club strangers very quickly became your best friends on neonatal wards and online, the fact you had never met most of them was irrelevant. Staff on units became the real superheroes not marvel characters. Our babies turned into Olympic fighters, if there was a category the UK would literally bring home liquid gold and every parent of every child would be a cheerleader for all babies not just their own.
Friendships are made in an instance that would rival any long term high school friendship, and if your baby had a baby next to them in NICU chances are they will be first best friends for life. I mean not many kids can say I’ve been best friend with my friend since before we were supposed to be born!
Everyday life in the real world is cruel, people aren’t nice to each other, people are jealous of what each other have and tear each other down. The preemie club pick each other up on bad days and good days, if a parent feels jealous watching another parent having a hold of their child they feel jealous for a minuscule of a second then feel utter guilt for thinking such a thing. In the normal world women don’t tend to empower each other, they make friends based on their social circle. In the preemie club you make friends with people you would never normally strike a conversation with because the preemie club has a code of honour that is everyone is there for each other regardless.
You see in the past 3 years team Little Miracles have become a family to each other as have the parents we support. We have supported each other not just through prematurity but bereavement of family members, divorces, children being diagnosed with the unthinkable, we are just always there for each other because that’s the golden rule of being in the club….
Why? I don’t know, none of us know why we were chosen. We just were. And after the initial heartbreak, we do what survivors do, we make sure anyone else going through it is supported too, our babies, our miracles teach us how to fight and once you learn how to you can’t stop.
I am so incredibly proud to be founder of such an incredible preemie club and I hope all of you amazing parents can continue in supporting us too… after all this is a rollercoaster many of us will never get off.